Brain

What do I fill my brain with?

Now that I don’t have you?

I go for a walk

I want to touch the grass

But don’t

Who stops on a walk anymore

I want to go home

Left alone and watch Billions

Attempt to go to bed early

To fall asleep miserably late

To go without vice

I crave a rainstorm

And a blank white wall

To cast fantasies upon

The guilt of it

Probably ages me more

Than it itself

I read what I write

And cringe

This sober thing

I hold my breath

Who goes without vice?

I examine

Those with power

Those without

Those who do good

Those who’ve yet to know good

And none

Are exempt

How to take the edge off?

Adopt another vice

At least the devil is new

Show me a man without vice

And I’ll show you

A pack of cigarettes

Under their pillow case

I know

One day

You’ll find my cigarettes

Under my pillowcase

Humans

We judge

So judge me on the basis

That all remain in the box

Unused

Maybe

It’s about living with vices

Rather than defeating them

Perhaps it’s coexistence

Balance

In some twisted way

When I come home

I want to be alone

No tv

No screen

Just the wall

The one with nothing on it

And my bed

To try again tomorrow

Brain

What do I fill you with

Now that I go without?